They say that how green your grass is usually is a matter of perspective. But in my case, it truly is greener on the other side. As part of preparing to become a mom, I purchased a house last summer. Since I haven’t been able to focus on baby planning, I’ve been using my time and energy to decorate my house and fix up my yard.
As soon as spring arrived and we got a little warm weather I started working in my yard. I’ve always envisioned that when I bought a house I would have plush green grass. Grass that looks like this:
Instead, I have grass that looks like this:
The previous owner of my house didn’t take care of the lawn at all and it was overrun with moss and weeds. So I bought some products to kill the moss and weeds, to prepare it for new grass seeds, which made it look even worse. A couple of weeks ago I put down grass seeds and have been watering my grass daily, hoping to see a fresh new lawn by now. Unfortunately that hasn’t been the case. Some of the seeds took and I have pretty little blades of grass springing up, but there are a lot of spaces in which the grass decided not to grow at all. Looking at my neighbors’ lawns I started to have lawn envy. Everyone has a nice full, green lawn, and I have dirt, with patches of grass here and there. So last week I bought more grass seeds and put them down with the hope that this time it will take and I will finally have the green lawn that I want. I’m going to keep working on it — getting up early every day to water it, putting down fertilizer and more grass seeds where necessary. With every little new blade that pops up, I get closer to having that green green grass that I want…
Thinking about my lawn made me think about this process of trying to get pregnant. Going back and forth to the doctor and trying to get my thyroid levels under control to get my body ready and able to conceive, is kind of like getting rid of the moss and weeds in the lawn to prepare it for the new grass. I’ve had a little set back with my thyroid being a little overactive now and everything is delayed yet again, which has truly been disappointing. But with a little extra time and care, things will be under control, and I will be able to move forward and my body will be ready to get pregnant. Hopefully it won’t take multiple attempts like with the planting of my grass seeds.
For a control freak like myself, it’s hard to let go and let things happen. But I am learning to embrace the fact that everything happens in its own time. And as my friend K told me: “The sweetest things in life are the ones you had to work or fight to have.” So, instead of stressing, today I took a break from my lawn care and participated in the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life with K. It was a great way to get a little exercise in while raising money for cancer research. While we were at the event, I saw K walking toward me with a piece of paper with something crawling on it. My reaction to her was: “Whatever that is, I don’t know why you’re bringing it this way.” She said: “Relax, I’m bringing you something good.” And with that, she placed a ladybug in my hand and told me to make a wish. So with a smile, I closed my eyes, made my wish, and thought nothing but positive thoughts as the ladybug flew away.
Here’s looking forward to green grass!!! 🙂